Triggers – a personal story

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I’m no expert. I have lived with triggers all my life but didn’t know they were triggers until I was in my late 30s.

It was a body memory evoking trigger [that lasted] ten years

What is a trigger in terms of a psychological phenomena? Wikipedia describes:

trauma trigger is the subjective attribution that a psychologic stimulus caused someone to recall the memory of a previous psychological trauma, although the stimulus itself need not be frightening or traumatic and can be indirectly or superficially reminiscent of an earlier traumatic incident. Trauma triggers are related to posttraumatic stress disorder(PTSD), a condition in which people often cannot control the recurrence of emotional or physical symptoms,[1] or of repressed memory.[2][3][4] Triggers can be subtle and difficult to anticipate,[1][5] and can sometimes exacerbate PTSD. A trauma trigger may also be referred to as a trauma stimulus or a trauma stressor.[6]

Remembering times in my past where I had been mildly dissociated. I surmised that I may have been triggered and didn’t know it. Then there were the blackouts with substances and then without substances where triggers were most definitely involved, but impossible to identify.

I told myself that my body felt safe

One of the first pervasive triggers that I experienced lasted during all my waking hours for ten years. It was was a body memory that evoked triggers but in the beginning had no emotion attached to it and then there were fleeting feelings of sadness, grief and moments of profound depression. After those feelings passed the one that remained was rage. It was always there in the background.

The body memory was related to sexual trauma and PTSD symptoms. The specific body memory was a sensation in my jaw that someone was trying to open my mouth and I was resisting with all my might.

One of the difficulties with triggers are identifying that I have been triggered.

I told myself that my body felt safe enough to remember the trigger. Each time I noticed the body memory trigger its physical sensations and accompanying emotions I told myself that my body was releasing the memories.

One day after ten years I woke up and thought: “Something is different.” When I first acknowledged that the body memory had ceased it came back immediately. Within a few days it disappeared. It returns occasionally but is no longer a fixture in my life.

One of the difficulties with triggers are identifying that I have been triggered. Sometimes it has taken me days to realize I have been triggered especially if I feel angry or rageful with a seemingly rational reason.

The nature of being triggered flips me into being isolated because perpetrators isolated me to abuse me.

There have only been three times where I have been able to identify the source of the trigger. One was the body memory of sexual abuse, already mentioned above. I was with a client in his home. He pursed his lips a certain way and I had a visceral response of wanting to punch him and beat him up. I had to bite my tongue to calm down and restraint myself from beating him up. Why the trigger occurred was not in doubt, what it was – was uncertain.

In October of 1995 when I was driving back from having had therapy in Pt. Reyes Station I was driving under a plume of smoke from the Mt Vision fires that destroyed over 40,000 acres. The smoke made the sun red as it set. When I returned home I was inconsolably in tears. I called my therapist – why was I so upset? I had asked. “The fire is big and out-of-control just as your perpetrators were when you were young.” She suggested I use a coping tool to calm down and manage the trigger. I did.

The problems with most triggers are:

  • An environmental cue activates trauma from our past.
  • Once triggered we often enter a regressed or frozen state when we had been traumatized – and may not realize we have been triggered (a call for help to a support person or persons may be useful).
  • We may act out as a result of having been triggered. (This can be mild to major and perhaps life-threatening).
  • We may appear non-rational to others where they may shun us or they may also get triggered.
  • The desire to identify and control future triggers may consume us. Realizing this is an impossible venture is a good first step to work on defusing and working with future triggers.

The nature of being triggered flips me into being isolated because perpetrators isolated me to abuse me. So when I get triggered, especially when I don’t realize I am triggered I isolate. It was a strategy I used as a child to survive. It may or may not have worked very well but when I am triggered and don’t know I am triggered it remains my “go-to” strategy.

Thinking about what “just happened” and analyzing it with the thought that “If I can figure it out I can – know what happened to me; – I can prevent it from happening again.

Thinking was what I used as a child from inside the trauma to survive is a habit. But it doesn’t necessarily work very well to solve the emotional trigger of the trauma. Its one of the ways I perpetuate remaining isolated and lost in a regressive or frozen state of trauma from the past.

Its good to have a preemptive plan to deal with triggers in advance so we can get the help we need until we reach a place where we can deal with triggers more effectively.

This is where a therapist can assist or a self-help guide.

I have found that when I know that I’m triggered that I tell myself I am ready to handle it because I’m aware that I’ve been triggered. However if I’m triggered but am not yet aware of it, I know that I feel stuck, agitated, and/or distressed emotionally I try one of the following options:

  • I reach out for support
  • I ask for feedback
  • I ask for help
  • I sit with my feelings and try to identify what they are before taking any action.

This is just a sample and in no way is what I recommend.

What I do recommend is for you to come up with your own safety plan for dealing with emotional upsets, stuck places and triggers.

[NOTE: I was triggered by my partner when we were hiking Mount Tamalpais (in Marin County California). I told her. She wanted to take responsibility by wanting to know what she had done to trigger me. I told her I didn’t know and that it wasn’t her fault. I told her that I just wanted her to know in case she felt me pulling away from her during my process of the trigger and using my safety measures. I’m not sure she understood and decided not to tell her again if I had been triggered due to her response.

Often in dysfunctional relationships we put responsibility on others for our emotions. This is a reaction that does not make another responsible for our response. We have feelings. In relationships – couple therapy is a good idea to help resolve interpersonal communications and dysfunctional dynamics. Individual therapy can be useful too.

When a trigger brings up a feeling in one person and that one person blames another for their trigger – this is an incorrect understanding of a trigger. Conversely of a non-triggered person enters into an interaction with a triggered partner for example especially if the triggered person is unaware they have been triggered then a mess ensues. If the triggered person becomes aware they have been triggered and the non-triggered partner attempts to intervene – to fix the situation then what occurs still could result in a mess.

One possible way to prevent a trigger from creating a mess would to speak with your partner about your triggers. Explain to them they are in no way responsible for the emotional reactions they – the triggered person, may have and that they may need:

  • space
  • try to be patient – wait
  • for the non-triggered person not to make assumptions
  • know they are in no way responsible for having been triggered.

A Search through Dreams

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In late September of 1990 I called out to the Spirit World to guide me to a new place to live. I worked through my network while searching for a new place to live. The house I was sharing with two housemates had become intolerable due to addiction issues with one housemate and the co-dependence of the other.

We found a peace school

I asked for a dream to guide me:

I dreamt that I was traveling with a friend from the Sonoma Valley to Napa Valley on a secret road that paralleled Trinity Road and Dry Creek Road into Napa County. We found a peace school and a few others secret places where I felt drawn to on a heart level.

Iris at a church service recommended Jim Hallock who as it turned out at purchased her old house on Trinity Road in Glen Ellen about 1,000 feet above the valley. He had an unlisted phone number. Iris gave me the address and I wrote him a letter.

He called me. I went and looked at the small apartment beneath his house. I brought deposit cash with me. He told me that just before he picked up the mail his tenant gave notice that he was moving out. Jim was delighted with the synchronicity. I offered him deposit dollars and he said:

“No, I take you at your word.”

I moved in on November 1, 1990. A few months Jim told me he was lowering my rent because he liked me.

We became good friends and we played Ping-Pong often.

In 1998 Jim sold the house to Klaus. He moved to Colorado with his wife Nora and began building houses with an adobe brick making machine.* Klaus gave me 6 months notice because he liked me and wanted to remain friends with Jim

In July of 2000 when Klaus gave me notice ( 6 months) I asked for a dream and I did a vision quest for a new place.

I moved out 10 years and 1 month later in December of 2000.

*Jim was invited by the State Department to go to Mexico to help rebuild after a major earthquake. He started a second business of building adobe homes in Mexico. After dealing with wealthy people in the US and Mexico with whom didn’t pay their debts he started a non-profit and one of his projects was building a clinic somewhere in Africa to treat children with HIV.

 

My next dream finding place was a house with a tall tree at the front of the house. The owner was a tall lanky man that bore a resemblance to Sam Shepard, the playwright and actor. I took the dream to a vision quest.

had forgotten about my dream

In the waking vision I saw a house surrounded by nature. The house itself may have been built in the 1930s or 40s. The kitchen was on the left side towards the back with a screened in porch on the right overlooking a field. There may have been a detached garage.

In the living room there was a fireplace or maybe one that was sealed up. The place had one or two bedrooms.

The Redwood in the front yard became my teacher.

A friend suggested an ad in the paper and she wrote the ad for me.

When I looked at the place I had forgotten about my dream. It was within the city limits of Sonoma and was on a half-acre of land, a big field with a few tall trees. I walked through the backyard and saw that the TV antenna had fallen over since my arrival. That triggered me to remember the dream. The lawyer – landlord did resemble an older Sam Shepard. The layout of the house was dyslexic and there was no screened-in porch in the back.

I took the place.

 

The Redwood in the front yard of about 65 feet tall became a teacher.

https://psychesweather.wordpress.com/2015/12/17/journey-with-a-spirit-guide-the-redwood-tree/

 

A Short Story: Rump, Impeachment and the 2020 elections

wethepeople

America will need healing on a massive scale

Here is a short science-fiction story: Some time back I made a prediction based on visions that were revealed to me that Rump would leave office in June of 2019.

https://psychesweather.wordpress.com/2017/12/01/vision-and-the-headline-reads/

Fact or Fiction?

Recently that changed and I saw him completing his term.

That lasted until today when I received new information that the impeachment process will begin on June 1, 2019. When it nears completion in August or September (or during its process) it’s likely that Rump will do one of the following:

  • Create or foment a crisis to sway the impeachment vote and invoke Marshall Law
  • Have a medical emergency and leave office
  • Leave office before the final vote but not resign
  • Resign and be pardoned by Tence
  • Arrange for an “accidental” death of a Senator
  • Be the first president to be impeached.

If Rump is nominated to be re-elected the impeachment process would be catastrophic to his re-election bid.

Nevertheless America will need healing on a massive scale.

My Fiction Writing Process

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Long ago, in my late 20s, I found that establishing a rough ending to any fiction story whether it be a novel or short story was necessary to avoid wild uncontrollable tangents.

I don’t believe in writer’s block

After establishing a rough ending, then in the course of the story, most often a novel I have a rush to get to the end.

“Let’s get this over with,” I say to myself.*

“I’m tired of working on this. Let me move on to something else I’m not going to finish… yet.”

When the magical thinking tangent happens

So I write an intelligent action story with plot points, twists etc. I know I’m off base when I start to set up something (a tangent) that’s about to introduce super powers inconsistent with the powers that be and set the story in a different less character intimate magical thinking type thing.

When the magical thinking tangent happens I can usually do one of two things. One: go back into the story and look for a place where the new material can be set up in a way consistent with the story. Or Two: delete the section I’ve just written because it doesn’t fit.

the previous observation could be an analogous tangent

Since I don’t believe in writer’s block, I’ve come to see that blocks are temporary pauses to step back and run scenarios or do something else – like write this process blog piece. (Although in writing the current novel – Extreme Measures book 5 of a nine book Sci-Fi series is in the 4th chapter of non-stop action.) Meditation helps to clear the slate and wait for the story’s consciousness to pop up a way forward.

Find your voice.

Characters and the story that they find themselves in, have a life of their own. This could also be said of our lives through the voice of a Higher Self, an AI observer or God looking in on the course of our story. Or the previous observation could be an analogous tangent.

Writers have their processes. Most teachers of writing impart: “Write. Find your voice. No one can tell you how to become a good writer. It’s work. Keep going.”

I have a friend who is a retired advertising executive / writer who told me my writing process was wrong. I more she spoke about my process the more irritated I became. I finally told her that I was ending the conversation because I didn’t want to argue with her.

__________________

* When I want to write quickly to the ending of the story I may let myself do that and then go back and add the other stuff. However it’s far easier to allow conflict and blocks to character forward movement in the form of the main action and weaving sub-plots during the course of moving towards the end than to go back and add it later. The step-by-step process is enticing and exciting for me. And I have found readers like it too.

Enneagram as Process – a primer

EnnegramKitchenAtWork

Many of you who are readers – the above diagram have come to know the enneagram (nine-picture) as a tool for nine personality types. The lesser-known function of the enneagram is a system for processing complex operations. The enneagram operates on the Mystery Numbers as uncovered by Nikola Tesla as the 3, 6, 9 sequence.

Nine is a number of completion and represents the sum of all the parts of the process and a mystical element as represented by the gap between numbers 4 and 5.

Nine is also an invisible force

Three represents the law of three a building block of the universe and in this case #3 is a positive urge or active principle, #6 is a negating urge or receptive principle and #9 is a neutral urge / position or a reconciling principle. The law of three supports all actions and yet is separate from linear actions.

Six operated on two plains of existence: a progression from 1 to 4 followed by a shock that activates 5 through 8 in an exterior cause and effect relationship and the inner lines are the connecting / uniting principles that are not so easily recognized.

  1. 1 to 4
  2. 4 to 2
  3. 2 to 8
  4. 8 to 5
  5. 5 to 7
  6. 7 to 1

The inner lines can also flow in reverse supporting the internal structure of the process.

Nine is also an invisible force and is often overlooked in everyday life. Neutrality technical speaking is not an urge or a force per-se. A neutron as part of an atom holds no charge, where as electrons are negatively charged and protons are positively charged. When we exclude 9 from the equation we have an octave since it is both neutral and the combination of all the parts into the unity of the entire process.

1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8EnnegramKitchenAtWorkNine represents the unity of the entire process of The Kitchen at Work preparing, serving and eating the meal. It is the neutral point where all is happening and nothing is happening simultaneously. Three are the Raw Materials of the meal being prepared such as vegetables, meat, dairy products, eggs, cooking oils, spices and so on. Six are the recipients of the cook meal whether it be the community, family or the chef.

the Mystery Numbers as uncovered by Nikola Tesla as the 3, 6, 9 sequence

The independence of the triangle (triad) 9 – 3 – 6 can exist without the process of >>>1 – 2 – 4 – 5 – 7 – 8 in a place of expectation or energy potential. The six other points of 1 – 2 – 4 – 5 – 7 – 8 cannot exist without the triad. Potential energy fueled through our will yields a process that is a working kitchen for the preparation, cooking, serving and eating of meals.

[NOTE – the next piece will utilize the enneagram as a way to look at the processes of time]


For further reading about the enneagram as a system for process see:

The Intelligent Enneagram by A.G. E. Blake

https://www.amazon.com/Intelligent-Enneagram-G-Blake/dp/1570622132

What is Time?

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Who am I?

 

Who are we?Purpledaywave

 

Who are we as humans?

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What is between all our collective pasts and all our possible futures?

BeingTime*

 

Who are we as humans?

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Who are we?

Purpledaywave

 

Who am I?

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* a circle is a ring of time holding past and future. An incomplete circle as the one that appears here is a sign of the urge to complete being. Human Beings are defined by the limits of a corporeal form – a physical body subject to the classical laws of Newtonian Physics and yet Human Consciousness can transcend the body – thus the opening.

 

Some Flaws of Capitalism or…

wethepeople

Or Some Flaws of Capitalism in its Current Incarnation

 

These ideas are not a new idea or proposition set forward below:

Sixty years ago my family bought a GE toaster that I have and I use regularly. It makes good toast. I have had other toasters and a few toaster ovens that have broken and were eventually too expensive to repair.

a rubric of infinite resources, income and growth in a finite world

Capitalism after WWII was steeped in growth, craftsmanship and materialism. It was a time a massive rebuilding, re-population and expansion. Though mass production reigned, craftsmanship and materialism were the building blocks of capitalism. Labor unions, industry and government were partners in reconstruction after the war and there was a resplendent growth of the middle class and income.

Capitalism in its continual reinvention of itself relies on some major flaws. One of the most obvious flaws are the finite limits of growth. It operates under a rubric of infinite resources, income and growth in a finite world.

The vestiges of citizenship were degraded into “the consumer”

In the 1980s capitalism threw off the last vestiges of materialism in favor of mass consumerism through planned obsolescence. The shift from materialism to accelerated consumer based capitalism accentuated the flaws of the system and produced lemmings running to the sea. Capitalism became the religion of the land and democracy grew more entrenched as a slave to consumer-capitalism.

Corporations have become the new citizens who have delegated individuals as the consumers of goods and services.

The vestiges of citizenship were degraded into “the consumer” as political action committees (PACs) usurped individual citizens’ participation in government and re-election of so-called “representatives”. Congresspersons and Senators have become the servants of corporations in order to streamline government for accelerated capitalism. As citizens have become superfluous they have in-turn been plugged into being consumers of products and services of demagogue type of capitalism.

Corporations have become the new citizens who have delegated individuals as the consumers of goods and services. Products have been redefined into smaller parts designed to wear out swiftly and /or be replaced by newer “improved” models. Services are also degraded by dividing services into smaller portions, employing less qualified people and by outsourcing – language barrier problems (outsourcing is double-speak for layoffs).

The finite world is ignored for immediate quarterly profits

Another PAC strategy for corporate agendas is making “representatives” into divisive enemies so that either nothing is accomplished for individuals. One PAC strategy are “a no-holds barred” attacks against the enemy such as Republicans versus Democrats; Pro-Life versus Pro-Choice, etc. Democracy has been lost in the process and applies more to corporations than individuals. Giant powerful PACs are increasingly controlled by the top tenth of the one percent wealthiest individuals who ascribe to making more money and a consolidation of power.

The finite world is ignored for immediate quarterly profits. The focus of corporate/business and financial leadership is profitability in the next three months that can be extrapolated into a yearly goal. Looking into a future of the limits of growth based on finite resources is not built into consumer-capitalism. As a result the current reiteration of capitalism is systemically handicapped to deny finite resources through faulty cognitive re-framing. Some of this is the momentum of the capitalistic system fueled by greed and a lust for power and some must have a conscious design. At the base of this consolidation of power is an addiction of greed fueled by fear.

(Conservative/GOP) group views consumers below a certain income level and all liberals as potential servants, serfs and those needing manipulation

While consumer-capitalism within a broken patriarchal system has its own momentum that may carry many leaders of this movement along in a short-term gain (that looks long-term in the context in which they flourish) there is another conscious force at work. Some of the top tenth of the one percent of wealth in the world fights for increasing consolidation of power and wealth (call them A) while others fight for a more equitable distribution of wealth (call them Z).

A’s use their money, power and influence to create obstacles in government to further or block the agenda of the other side. When Newt Gingrich came into power he begun to characterize the opposition – the Democrats as “enemies” of the people. Before that time Democrats and Republicans may have vehemently disagreed with one another and their goal was to govern so they compromised to move their agenda forward. The current climate between Liberals and Conservatives is combat. There seems to be less compromise. Conservatives work at blocking Liberals at every turn. The result is no new legislation is adopted. Even in the current Republican block to repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act has only left the ACA in shambles and disrepair. Its as if the GOP’s secret wish was (is) to replace the ACA with nothing. The A group is moving towards satisfaction with the ACA being replaced by nothing because they wish to see a world that existed before the implementation of the Income Tax – 1912. When US Congress is deadlocked and new legislation is passed the A Group is generally satisfied. The only times that the A group may be dissatisfied is when legislation that favors their position is not voted into law.

Since 1776 to 2015 the US has been involved in wars 93% of the time

The A Group views consumers below a certain income level and all liberals as potential servants, serfs and those needing manipulation to motivate them towards they’re agenda.

The A Group does not want:

  • Income equality
  • Advancements in public education – (or consumers to think for themselves for then they may become citizens)
  • Racial equality
  • LGBT equality
  • Women to have equal rights, equal pay, the right to have control over their bodies (pro-choice), equal protection under the law
  • Consumers to live in a world without fear
  • To acknowledge that Climate Change caused by and /or contributed to by humans is real.
  • Considers the ACA a hand-out and doesn’t want government to support public health for all
  • All government programs devoted to public welfare as entitlements to be (Social Security, Medicare etc.)
  • To have peace in the world unless monitored by a strong US military presence in order to have a foothold on remaining limited resources

The Koch brothers (see end note) could be considered the most identifiable humans belonging to the A Group while Libertarians, Conservatives and some Republicans are also A Group members. A notable Z-Group member is George Soros and his organization (see end notes).

FDR President Roosevelt created social nets to assist the US to move out of the Great Depression, but the final impetus that extricated the US from the depression and accelerated growth was the entrée into and winning WWII. Prior to the mid to late 1980s the premise of wars were to stop the spread of Communism as represented by the now former Soviet Union and China while expand US interests. Now wars seem to be oriented towards oil resources.

Earth’s nutrients are the raw materials for corporate products. Some of Earth’s nutrients are renewable – as in agricultural fruits and vegetables, farm animals etc. Some farming techniques although provide greater crop yield may deplete the soil in such a way to make it non-sustainable over the longer term. Other of earth’s resources such as elements – metals and oil are non-renewable and finite.

Capitalism especially in its latest consumeristic reshaping does not consider the resources from the Earth in its cost effect analysis in part to the patriarchal mind-set and in-part to shortsightedness – quarterly profits.

The consumeristic-capitalism has been marked by US Political struggles of almost a constant state of war. Since 1776 to 2015 the US has been involved in wars 93% of the time (see end note). The only period the US was not involved in a war was 1935 to 1940 during an isolationist period during the Great Depression.

The current Trump administration is a characterization of all that elitists members of the GOP and conservatives represent as well as a longing for the good old days before the income tax and in support of isolationist ideals. It represents patriarchal self-interest that contributes to increasing isolationism, mergers, and maximizing profits for the wealthy elite, disregarding any community-based profits based on sustainability, protecting natural resources – environmental protections while marginalizing, discounting and enslaving those that have less by:

  • keeping their wages fixed and/or lowered
  • keeping them out of labor unions and making “labor unions” a dirty word
  • dividing them into factions that war against each other
  • gutting public education and dumbing down citizen’s ability to reason
  • providing entertainment that discourages reasoning
  • providing entertainment that displays the hopeless world that they live and will live in the future (only much worse) and that one common person can be the hero or savior
  • promotes the “myth of the American Dream”
  • encourages disempowered citizens to fear so that a limited number of avenues are open to them:
  • The American Dream
  • Fundamentalist Religion
  • Blaming or scapegoating a group of people based on race or ideology
  • Providing simple solutions to complex problems often based on “the American Dream mythology”

 

NOTES:

  1. Koch Family https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Koch_family#Family_members
  2. George Soros https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Soros
  3. US Wars https://www.globalresearch.ca/america-has-been-at-war-93-of-the-time-222-out-of-239-years-since-1776/5565946

 

Composite Beings – Part Two

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The higher vibrational being (HVB) who enters may remain as an observer for a time before it produces a noticeable event in the child’s or adolescent’s life. Fractured or alternative personalities already exist within the host due to traumatic events that are often on going. A DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) is a coping strategy that some individuals use to deal with extremely impactful traumatic wounds. HVBs are attracted to those suffering from DIDs and look for ways to mesh with the wounded individuals that provide a modicum of strength, protection and may be utilized for aspects of integration in a therapeutic healing process.

Self-acceptance is very important in the healing process.

Just as traumatic events produce fractured wounds and decimate the individual into separate personalities to manage aspects of the trauma the Higher Vibrational Being seeks to augment managing personality parts with positive past, current and parallel realities and lives to support the individual in a wider context. Once the individual begins to incorporate the HVB neuronal patterns, and experiential fragments of the wider context then a cognitive frame can be created with the original organizing self for more effective administration of the wounded personalities for healing.

the HVB may produce synchronistic events that appear “magical” or have extrasensory phenomena

The HVB and the various fragmented parts can come together more quickly and can either be reintegrated into a healing self or co-exist cooperatively with one another. Self-acceptance is very important in the healing process. Finding a therapist and /or a shaman-interdimensional healer who works towards unconditional acceptance of the DID / HVB synergy is extremely important for healing and for future work. [NOTE: not all DID individuals have a HVB entree]. The shaman and/or interdimensional healer can offer a community for the wounded individual with a HVB to be accepted into gracefully.

It’s also possible and likely that the wounded individual will not notice the HVB until the individual has worked towards reintegration and /or a peace cooperation or coexistence between the alternate personalities. When recognition occurs there has been enough work to raise the vibration of the individual as well as integration between the HVB and at least one of the conscious core selves.

Awareness of a high vibration being is a tricky affair.

 Until the time of recognition the HVB may produce synchronistic events that appear “magical” or have extrasensory phenomena associated with an incident or incidents. The presence of an HVB within a person with a dissociative identity disorder or fractured selves does not necessarily guarantee automatic healing. Therapeutic work on a psychological level must occur as well as somatic treatments and inner work as in a spiritual practice or some semblance thereof.

Awareness of a high vibration being is a tricky affair. If the HVB reveals itself before a context has been established and the ego of the host is not strong enough to handle the impact the individual may be prematurely diagnosed with additional psychiatric disorders such as schizophrenia. Medication could destroy the host’s identity as well as extremely hinder the effectiveness of the HVB to carry out its mission.

[NOTE: Amalgamated Beings are several HVBs fused together that take human form bypassing indigenous humans in the reincarnation process.]

Composite Beings – Part One

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A number of years ago in the 1980s the term “walk-in” gained popularity especially with new age thinkers. Ruth Montgomery first coined it in a book published in 1979: Strangers Among Us [1].

peaceful co-existence between the dissociative parts and personalities or a hunger for integration.

Walk-Ins were high vibrational beings who replaced “souls” that wanted to leave due to personal trauma [1]. Later in the 1980s and 90s the walk-in name was expanded to include a permanent or temporary stay by the higher vibrational being and/or sharing knowledge with the individual host [2].

Composite Beings have been with us before our current written history

However when knowledge and experience are shared between the original host and the higher vibrational being there is a blending. This is a Composite Being. Usually the single “walk-in” experience was obscured or cloistered from the host for many years until an urge for healing becomes oriented towards either peaceful co-existence between the dissociative parts and personalities or a hunger for integration.

Composite Beings have been with us before our current written history and occur for a variety of opposing reasons:

The Host (receptive vessel):

  • Is an old soul in the cycle of reincarnation
  • Has had single or numerous severe traumatic events and/or losses in childhood or adolescence
  • Has responded to trauma with a Dissociative Personality Disorder strategy over time
  • In the multiple dissociative states including Alternate Personalities there is a great longing for unification and/or peace and balance.

 

A Higher Vibrational Being (active vessel):

  • The Higher Vibrational Being is an older soul than the host
  • Has a karma/dharma link with the receptive vessel or host
  • Provides a unifying personality feature and strength of character needed by the host
  • The Higher Vibrational Being is on an active mission that allows healing to occur for the host while healing energies spill over to humanity at large directly and/or indirectly
  • The Higher Vibrational Being’s mission besides healing may extend to other areas.

 

The Neutral Vessel is Planet Earth.

 

Composite Beings are attracted to one another whether or not they are aware of the composite blending within themselves for the purpose of awakening and healing.

Once a fractured personality strategy is acknowledged in the conscious ego of the host where the Composite Being is acknowledged and recognized and healing begins other Composite Beings are attracted to one another on a higher vibrational level for the purpose of their missions.

When awakening begins to blossom within the Composite Being other Composite beings on the same or higher vibrational frequency are drawn to each other. The other Composite Beings are on a continuum of self-discovery where they may assist or be assisted by each other for the purpose of healing and fulfilling the individual and collective missions.

 

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walk-in

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walk-in

[2] http://www.crystalinks.com/walk_ins.html

 

The Luckiest of Days: Friday the 13th

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Sacred Day: Friday April 13, 2018 at 13:13:13 GMT

History

The patriarch authority in the form of Christian monks demonized all Goddess worship in order to suppress and replace pagan rituals.

Friday or the Goddess Freya was called unlucky by the Christian authority because it was a day of the sacred female divinity. Friday the 13th was made to be unlucky because it was associated with the 13th month of the year in the Menstrual Calendar. [1]

In many religions Friday was (is) considered the 7th day of the week and is the most sacred day.

Fish was eaten on Fridays as a fertility right, which was later absorbed into a Christian ritual. [1]

The Church in Europe used the Julian calendar. Peasants used the Menstrual or Goddess-Given calendar. The Lunar calendar was 13 months of 28 days each, each week being 7 days. (13×28=364 plus 1) – was the Menstrual Calendar that conformed to the cycles or phases of the moon namely:

  • New
  • Waxing
  • Full
  • Waning

The Moon cycles correspond with a woman’s menstrual cycle thus the Menstrual Calendar. [2]

Chinese women established a lunar calendar about 3,000 years ago dividing the stellar sky into 28 “mansions” that the moon transversed. The Great Mayan calendar had first been based on “her menstrual cycles”. The word “mensis” is Latin for month, Greek, Middle English and High German – moon. [2]

No one knows – as in a documented sense where this suppression and demonization of woman / the Goddess arises. Astrologer Jeffery Wolf Green writes about the end of the matriarchy and beginnings of the patriarchy in his astrology books. The male rebellion against the Goddess appeared to contain the seeds of the hatred and repudiation of the feminine within a patriarchal dominated culture.

Green states (am I am summarizing and paraphrasing) that women believed that spirit – the divine worked through men to delivery the seed for children to come into the womb of women. Men were superfluous vessels for the seed to be carried. The seed or sperm did not originate with men it originated in the divine feminine and men were hollow vessels in service to the Goddess. The matriarchy raised children in a group setting, there was no family with a man as the leader. All property was held communally. There was no need for weapons of war, no armies, no defense against invaders because everyone lived this way for a few thousand years. [3]

Green states that men became increasingly angry over time and began to over throw female leadership in a violent acting-out manner of raping, pillaging and murder on a massive scale. [3]

What evolved out of that was the family. The man was the leader and the owner of woman and children. I would be remiss if I didn’t write about the legacy of anger that each man holds over women, other men and children as well as dominion over “the earth”.

Some men continue to act-out this anger in the context of the patriarchal system without any self-awareness. Other men have or are continuing to struggle to examine the legacy of anger and the anger within themselves to find a cause for it and work on resolving it responsibly as it arises.

Until more men can and do step forward individually and as a group to own the accountability and responsibility for crimes against the other outside their gender then the legacy of anger will continue. This hard-wiring of anger is oppositional to all the principles of the matriarchy and the divine-feminine.

  • The matriarchy held all life as sacred with horizontal leadership
  • The matriarchy held all property communally.
  • The matriarchy treats property with equal rights and equal access.
  • The matriarchy held earth as a sacred being of the divine

 

  • The patriarchy holds the yang principle as supreme with hierarchical leadership.
  • The patriarchy holds only the elite or upper class as property owners.
  • The patriarchy is entitled to subjugate and enslave lower classes as property
  • The patriarchy in its rebellion against the matriarchy treats earth as an object to be used and consumed in a hierarchical matrix

 

 

Friday 4/13/18 at 13:13:13 Universal Time (1:13 pm GMT London, England)

The Divine Feminine Numbers:

Friday as the 7th day of the week represents constant rapid change

Four represent a foundation to be built upon

13 – the 13 months of the lunar year or menstrual calendar

2018 – 2 + 0 + 1 + 8 = 11

11 is Justice and/or a master number for building the new.

 

The Tarot Numbers:

 

month – 4

date – 13

hour (in military time) – 13

minutes – 13

seconds – 13

last two digits of the year – 18

equals – 74

add – (20 – the beginning two numbers of 2018) 2 + 0 + 7+ 4

equals – 13

add 1 + 3 = 4

 

Major Arcana:

13 is Death or Transformation (the Divine Feminine Principle)

4 is The Emperor – a principle of growth through a foundation of conflict seeking resolution

 

 

Astrology:

[All degrees in the chart (see illustration) are rounded up one degree if the number – not in bold is 1 minute or greater.]

13-13

Patriarchal Authority is highlighted and exhaled in authoritarianism. It is poised for a yang-based transformation triggered by a revolution of self. Patriarchal authority continues to go through a cycles of death and rebirth and this same authority is transforming the divine feminine. Goddess energies are making spiritual and emotional connections to the world community. Goddess energies are most likely to reveal an abundance of secrets set to transform the world of authority aka the patriarch. Communications and thinking are likely to be intense and in conflict seeking resolution with authority.

1. The Woman’s Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets,  Barbara Walker “Friday” pg 325-326

2. The Woman’s Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets,  Barbara Walker “Menstrual Calendar” pg 645-648

3. Pluto: The Evolutionary Journey of the Soul, Volume 1, Jeffery Wolf Green